Love & Marriage

Intimacy in marriage, sex, communication, boundaries, and romance.

How to Manage Finances in Marriage

Did you know that money is listed as one of the top reasons couples divorce? Why is money such a touchy subject? It’s touchy because: It involves shame or pride about whether you’re earning enough or earning at all. Money is often the measure of status, power or personal efficacy. You may feel entitlement about what you think you deserve. You or your spouse may be in denial of debt. You may have guilt over poor decisions in the past. It involves fear and insecurity about not having enough now or in the future. We compare ourselves with…

2 Ways to Improve your Communication Skills

If you’ve ever watched a soapie you’ll know that one of the biggest problems in the onscreen relationships is lack of communication. (This is why I don’t watch them – it frustrates me!) Half the drama could be eliminated if the people would either just tell each other what’s going on in their heads or stop assuming they know what the other person is thinking! (But then I suppose the story wouldn’t drag out for so long, right?) Whether you are just entering a relationship, about to get married, are newly married or have…

How to Talk About Issues in your Marriage Instead of Ignoring them

Do you ignore issues in your marriage and pretend everything is ok? Do you dread conflict so much that you’d rather not say anything? Do you hope the bad feelings will just go away? The reality is that avoiding emotional pain in your relationship works against you. Unsolved relationship issues trigger deeper worries about how safe and secure you feel together and will create emotional distance between you. This means you are missing out on some of the biggest blessings of marriage! How to bring up issues in your relationship How can you go from not talking to talking…

14 Things Not to do When You’re in a “Fight”

Every relationship has conflict. Whether it’s a marriage relationship, parent-child relationship or a work relationship, there’s going to be conflict because there are two people involved, both with different perspectives. Since conflict can’t be avoided it needs to be managed. How are you managing conflict in your relationships or is it going unresolved? Are you frustrated with your relationships because they are just not working? You may be doing some things that are making your conflict worse without even knowing it. 14 things NOT to do in a fight: 1. Don’t involve a third…

How to Reignite the Passion in your Marriage

Do you want to reignite the passion in your marriage? Is it really necessary to maintain the spark? Definitely! Just because you’ve been married for 10, 15, 25, 35 years, doesn’t mean you can’t have chemistry in your relationship. In fact, the state of your sexual intimacy indicates the state of your relationship. Sex is the canary in the coal mine. Let me explain. Miners used to place a canary in a cage inside the mine to alert them of the presence of deadly gases. If the canary fell over dead, the miners knew to get out…

4 Ways to Develop Spiritual Intimacy with Your Spouse

I’ve written about 4 Ways to Grow Intimacy in Your Marriage before, but today we’ll be looking at one aspect of intimacy – spiritual connection – and how to grow it as a couple. Only a secure connection with your spouse will build a marriage that lasts. But there’s more to connection than talking and touching. Aside from the physical and emotional elements, we also have a spiritual dimension. This is the one couples often skip – either because it’s non-existent or because they don’t think it’s important. But, it’s…

4 Ways to Increase Intimacy in Your Marriage

Have you lost the intimacy in your marriage and want to bring it back? Do you take each other for granted and long for the closeness you once had? Do you have a level of intimacy but long for more? Can you regain intimacy in marriage once you’ve lost it? Absolutely! What is intimacy? According to google it is close familiarity or friendship. Something personal or private.  Marriage was meant to be a place of knowing and being known – like no other knows or is known.   A place of friendship and close familiarity.  Achieving intimacy…

How to have Devotional Time with God as a Couple

The foundation of a Christian marriage is Christ. It makes sense then, that Christian couples should spend time with God – as a couple. Sadly, the spiritual side of many marriages is neglected and couples miss out on a huge bonding factor for their relationship. Sharing spiritual thoughts and praying together automatically brings a couple closer together and creates intimacy. But, reading the Bible and praying together can feel really awkward at first – because it’s actually quite an intimate thing to do. It can also be hard to find the time for couple devotions because you’re balancing careers, kids…

How to Let a Guy Know You Like Him without Appearing Desperate

How do you let a guy know you like him without coming on too strong? I was raised with these ideas drummed into me: Don’t chase guys.   Wait to be pursued and don’t show interest unless a guy has clearly initiated first. Being too friendly is cheap. I wasn’t sure if it was wrong to smile at a guy I liked, make eye contact with him, or talk to him. Was I supposed to ignore him and hope that somehow he would notice me? The fuzzy line between friendly and flirty left me confused, guilty, and unable…